The Story of Us

So, I ended up sleeping for about 11 hours last night but I've finally shaken the nausea from yesterday morning (that lingered ALL DAY).  Good deal.  Though I had planned on blogging a bit last night, I went to bed shortly after Sky...   I have yet to hear her this morning so in honor of the holiday I've decided to share a little about what happened with "Mr. Nice" as I referred to him in pre-baby posts, or DJ as I'll be referring to him going forward:

Well, going back a little before I stopped blogging, I met DJ through some mutual friends the day before my niece Sammie's birthday, June 12, 2011.  We quite obviously got pretty hot and heavy quickly considering I found out I was pregnant around August 6th.  If you recall, when DJ and I first started dating, he was living an hour away in his home town.  He worked as a welder for a large truck manufacturing company.  Once we found out I was expecting, he planned on staying put until about a month before I was due and then moving here and finding a place with me.  Unfortunately, he got himself fired from that position abruptly around early September.  While he could have found a temporary job there, he decided to move here right away instead of waiting.

===>Sky's awake now so the posting will be much slower now, but I'll finish the story eventually<===

So, without discussing it with me (or Justin for that matter), DJ started moving his stuff in with me into my small rented room in Justin's basement.  I was kind of irritated at the time, but I let it slide since we were planning on living together eventually anyways.  Historically speaking in terms of boyfriends, I have lived with several but only in 4-6 week stints.  So after about that much time in close proximity with DJ combined with my fluctuating pregnancy emotions, I started to think we were making a mistake.  But I just thought it was because we were living in such small quarters and sharing the rest of the house with 2 other people; I thought we just needed to get out into a place of our own.  In order to do that, we needed money.  I was hardly making any at my 2 part-time jobs.  DJ bounced through 4 jobs in his field before he finally found something he was willing to settle into.  That didn't happen until after New Years 2012.  Then we started looking for our own apartment.  We looked at a bunch of places that weren't happening, others we got turned away from because of poor credit and his history.  We finally found this great place that was (relatively) affordable that his dad co-signed for us to get into.  It really is a nice place, and I'll miss it after I move out.

Easter 2012

At any rate, we signed a 1 year lease on March 1st.  I was due March 30th, so we were closing in on our big arrival.  Our relationship at that time was rocky at best and I don't know why we thought that the baby would make things different for the better.  After Skylar was born April 7th, I immediately saw a loving father in DJ.  He genuinely loves her to pieces.  For the most part he does what is best for her in terms of health and care.  As far as our relationship goes, we lost all intimacy after the baby was born.  Partially because I had to heal from the trauma of childbirth of course.  But even after that, it was pretty clear to me we were growing apart romantically.
Around the end of last summer, I caught DJ up in a conversation about our future.  I told him I didn't see one if things didn't change.  I was fed up with being expected to all the housework while he feigned being too tired from work or the baby.  We worked the same number of hours, did the same amount of parenting and up until shortly after Christmas, I was still nursing...so with his logic, why shouldn't I be "too tired" to keep the house livable and clean too?  I was also disappointed in the loss of intimacy.  What kind of relationship was that for either of us?  Where's the draw?  Well he got emotional and told me he didn't want me to leave so we both decided to make more of an effort to make it work.

Thanksgiving 2012

I guess neither one of us was all that invested in making it work considering it never got better; it just slowly got worse and worse.  My grievances with him usually tend to be housekeeping related.  He is messy and careless which can be dangerous with an infant.  Apparently, he was never taught how to clean up after himself.  LAME.  I'll admit, I can be an OCD bitch about keeping things the way I think that they should be but some things are just common sense (ie not leaving garbage and choking hazards on the floor or anywhere within the baby's reach).
It's pretty clear to me that we've stayed together thus far purely for the baby.  If she weren't in the picture we'd have long since ended the relationship.  We've gotten to the point where I sit and 'uh-huh' through his boring stories about the same topic and he either interrupts me or gets up and leaves when I talk about something he's not interested in.  We had a massive fight right after Christmas which resulted in my resound decision to move out.  We are OBVIOUSLY not right for each other.  It just sucks that we're stuck living together until our lease is up at the end of February.  I've maintained for quite some time now that he's a great father but a crappy boyfriend.  So, we're planning on sharing custody.  This is fine with me as long as he can keep the apartment in a safe state of cleanliness for our little girl.

So there's the brief story of us.  And it only took 3 hours to finish!