It's been 2 weeks now...

Well, 29 started with a bang...and has since fizzled.  Re-ignition needed?  Sorely.  It's obviously been a few months since I've posted.  I stopped with the 40 Days of Fashion because of an obnoxious coworker.  And now, after all that has happened, I just don't feel like being particular about what I share and what I don't....

I met, by way of a mutual artist friend, a handsome, age-appropriate guy on which day of all days? My fucking birthday.  I was just thinking it was about time to throw in the towel and start internet dating again and my friend introduces me to Mr. Wonderful.  He really was wonderful...he's a single father of 2 amazing boys (that I actually got to spend time with).  He has full custody and a sordid backstory but we had many commonalities and similar values, both single parents and all.  I enjoyed all the time I spent with him; always aiming for more.  I became very comfortable with him, right away.  I guess I didn't see any harm because neither one of us was fresh out of our longer-term relationships (me, over 2 years, him, one).  We were dating casually but it wasn't casual.  I spent most of my summer with him, even volunteering 2 days of paid vacation time to go camping with him and his friends.  Just 2 days after our vacation weekend, he told me in passing that we needed to talk about our relationship.  He then ignored me completely for 3 days, and then sent me a "break-up note" by way of a series of text messages.  I saw him in passing a few days later to get my earrings back.  I tried to communicate how very hurt I am that he couldn't just tell me to my face that he didn't want to date me.  If he had just told me right away that it wasn't working it would have been completely different...but instead I just feel so stupid.  So dumb.  He mentioned wanting to possibly be friends in his last message.  I desperately want to be friends with him.  Aside from the fact that his best friend's wife is the one who set us up, and I really care for them both; I just can't keep my heart from caring about him.  My facebook news feed is just blowing up with all of their travels and it pains me to see him and not want to respond negatively because I still feel hurt.  I keep thinking that eventually he will see that I could be more than whatever it is he thinks I was.  But seriously, what sort of trash would I be to allow being treated like a dirty gym sock cast aside?  I'm so frustrated and sad about the whole situation that I find myself at a total loss still.  I feel like I'm grieving the loss of something extremely treasured while at the same time nursing some serious wounded pride.  Instincts are misleading...Happy Fucking Birthday to me, right?!

Soundtrack of the evening (after watching "Sleepless in Seattle"), the album Transatlanticism by Death Cab for Cutie...


This is fact not fiction, for the first time in years:

I just want somebody to love and accept me as I am, no changes necessary...he must be the rarest of gems with the difficulty I am having in finding him...

Roar!

Ok, so I feel I've sufficiently caught up in posting today for the last break but I really wanted to share a sweet awesome video of my lovely little girl getting her groove on.  She has quite good rhythm and loves to dance.  Lately she's been totally into girly music which is fine by me cuz I like it too.  One of our faves is "Roar" by Katie Perry.  I caught this video a few weeks ago, the pinnacle of the song and her interpretive dance:

I swear every time I watch it my heart fills up with pride like a mama bear and I even get teary about it sometimes.  I just love my beautiful little girl!  She's so spunky and fun, I cannot even imagine life without her...


PS.  This video should be viral cuz it's freaky fantastic.  Just sayin...

My Funny Valentine

I try not to get down around Valentine's Day anymore since I've spent so many alone.  And since DJ and I are not going to work out, I would not consider him to be my valentine (though last year he did get me a fabulous prenatal massage).  But my sweet baby Skylar is now and forever will be my funny valentine.

This morning before breakfast I snapped this picture of her blowing raspberries:

My funny valentine
Sweet comic valentine
You make me smile with my heart
Your looks are laughable
Unphotographable
Yet you're my favourite work of art

Is your figure less than greek
Is your mouth a little weak
When you open it to speak
Are you smart? 

But don't change a hair for me
Not if you care for me
Stay little valentine stay
Each day is valentines day

My Funny Valentine by Frank Sinatra

Beck - Peaches & Cream

I freaking love this song!

Zeds Dead - White Satin

Jason sent me a link a couple nights ago to a site with some pretty sweet music mixes. I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that the title of the set is actually a descriptor but they are good. I like the first one but this the second one was awesome.
Panty Dropping Dubstep on 8tracks.com

...

Ok so I'm totally into Fatal Attractions...but also, I decided to listen to some music made by an old coworker/friend of mine and some of his friends.  This awesomeness is available at:

Jet Stone and Moving On (aka Tim Young=Awesome)

PLEASE CHECK THIS OUT: HE'S TOTALLY AWESOME (and I'm not makin' it up)

Groovy workout

So the other night I decided to take a stab at cleaning excess crap off my computer.  Crap in the form of files that I've transferred to my external hard drive for storage, files I don't need anymore, and as it turns out duplicate files of all of my music.  I haven't even moved any photos over yet and I freed up almost 50 gigs of space!  After that I tried to download the latest version of iTunes and effectively erased my whole library and then reimported it.  I never did get that update to work; I'm downloading it off the website right now.  At any rate, I figured since I lost all my playlists I would put together a killer new workout playlist.  I've been gradually adding songs to the list for the past few days and tonight (after Evan and Melissa left) I decided to try it out.  I was busting a sweat by track 3.  It's not complete and I do plan on shuffling the track list from time to time (despite track 1 being the perfect track 1) but here's the list so far:

1.  The District Sleeps Alone Tonight by the Postal Service
2.  Umbrella Beach by Owl City
3.  Break Your Heart by Taio Cruz ft. Ludacris
4. Strangers by Portishead
5.  Sleepyhead by Passion Pit
6.  Tell Me What to Do by Metro Station
7.  Clubbed to Death (Kurayamino Mix) from Matrix Soundtrack
8.  Right Here Waiting by And Then There Were None
9.  Single Ladies by Beyonce
10.  Strawberry Avalanche by Owl City

I crapped out on the cardio around track 6 tonight since I got a decent workout in this morning.  Therefore, I'm not totally sure about the second half of the playlist.  For more creative inspiration I may have to revisit an old work-out playlist in the form of a burned CD from back in college when I would run everyday.  I know for sure track 1 is the same.  I'll be sure to repost the list once I gauge the possibilities of the songs already in it and find some other fresh funky jams to add to it.  This list will be my springboard back into running this spring when the roads thaw.  I may even be able to sport the iPod when I can bike again too. 

Random Bit of the Day

It just took me five minutes to get this page to load...wtf blogger?

Whatever, this performance of this song just popped into my head when I was driving home from work a little bit ago.  It took place on the second season of The Sing Off, just last month on NBC.  The group, Street Corner Symphony, was the runner-up at the finale, but this performance of Creep by Radiohead was phenomenal.  It still gives me goosebumps.  I hope they still get a contract or something after seeing how talented they are.


Street Corner Symphony "Creep" Sing Off Performance
Street Corner Symphony "Creep (Studio version)"

Random Bit of the Day

Jason reminded me last night of this most awesome invention of our dear Benjamin Franklin and quite possibly the most beautiful sounding instrument ever, the glass armonica.

Glass Armonica
Tchaikowsky's "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" on the Glass Armonica

Random Bit of the Day

So this random bit is going to be really really random... We've been kind of half watching reruns of The Office on TBS this evening.  And Dwight said something in passing about him and Michael being like the Lone Ranger and Tonto...which made me think of this song.  I kind of like it and haven't heard it in awhile.



Wild West Show by Big and Rich

Hey-ya...

Mmmmusic

I found this song a few days ago in my quest for new music but it got overshadowed by that Vampire Weekend song "Horchata" that I found that night.  I've been playing this one a ton though...check it:

More Time by Needtobreathe

This is AMAZING.

I am just hearing this for the very first time...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkUQ-OBazbc

Um. I. Love. This. Song.

LAJ

This song came up too...it's one of my favs.  Given the right setting, I just cry.
I always dedicate it to the one who did not come to be.

This is the Future by Owl City

Mmm, Pandora...

...it's rocking my socks off right now.  I heard the best version of this song and I can't seem to get enough of it lately.

Rock my F-ing Socks Off!!!

Color Themed Betta

In the Spring of 2009, I got three Betta fish named Purple Haze (like the song), Red Dawn (like the movie), and Midnight.  I had one older Betta named Craig that I'd had for a year already when I got the new three.

Purple Haze

 Red Dawn

Midnight

 

All four on my desk.  Left to Right: Red Dawn, Craig, Midnight, Purple Haze.

Oddly syncronized commercials during Heroes...

I'm watching Heroes right now and there was an "I am a Phoenix" commercial on followed immediately by a car commercial backed with a song by the band Phoenix...

Strange?

You tell me.

Produce Pic of the Day

It doesn't matter if you're skinny
It doesn't matter if you're fat
You can dress up like a sultan in your onion head hat.

...my backbone is paper thin...

Cave In by Owl City

Please take a long hard look through your text book
'Cause I'm history
When I strap my helmet on I'll be long gone
'Cause I've been dying to leave
Yeah, I'll ride the range and hide all my loose change
In my bedroom
'Cause riding a dirtbike down a turnpike
Always takes it's toll on me

I've had just about enough
Of quote, "diamonds in the rough"
Because my backbone is paper thin
Get me out of this cavern
Or I'll cave in

If the bombs go off
The sun will still be shining
Because we've heard it said that every mushroom cloud
Has a silver lining
(Though I'm always undermining too deep to know)
Swallow a drop of gravel and blacktop
'Cause the road tastes like wintergreen
The wind and the rain smell of oil and octane
Mixed with stale gasoline
I'll soak up the sound trying to sleep on the wet ground
I'll get ten minutes give-or-take
'Cause I just don't foresee myself getting drowsy
When cold integrity keeps me wide awake

Get me out of this cavern
Or I'll cave in

I'll keep my helmet on just in case my head caves in
'Cause if my thoughts collapse or my framework snaps
It'll make a mess like you wouldn't believe
Tie my handlebars to the stars so I stay on track
And if my intentions stray I'll wrench them away
Then I'll take my leave and I won't even look back

I won't even look back

Turning irritation and frustration into productivity...

That's what the rest of today is for...

I just want to throw something out into the internet universe that I decided today that I want to do.
I want to go on a hot air balloon ride with my best good friend.
If I do that, I may one day consider sky diving.  I just think that being that high up outside an airplane is a rush I can only dream of...and I want it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6OQFnUrbW8

Vanilla Twilght (part 1 I'm sure)

"As  many times as I blink, I'll think of you tonight"

Yes.